***READER DISCRETION: CONTAINS GRAPHIC MATERIAL AND IS NOT SUITABLE FOR ANYONE UNDER THE AGE OF 17. -- TRIGGER WARNING: SELF MUTILATION, HOMICIDAL IDEALIZATIONS, SEXUAL VIOLENCE, FOUL LANGUAGE.***
Mental Breakdown
I put my sanity on reserve/I never knew what I deserved
I'm just here/I'm alive/I'm existing
But I'm barely alive
Wide awake/He's asleep
But right now he's all I need
Love destroyed me/It broke me down
Turned my world upside down
Now my hand is out
I'm reaching, grasping for something real
But no one ever wants to tell me how they feel
I understand
What do I gotta do
to make a nigga like you
fall in love with a wreck like me
who already fell in love with perfection like you
I'm a mess can't you see
Barely breathing
Internally screaming/Internally dreaming/Internally bleeding
I'm screaming FUCK YOU.
Why won't you love me
My head hurts
Why won't you love me
I'll say it until I'm numb
Just tell me I'm the one
Tell me I'm not numb
Tell me that you look at me
& I'm your only one
Tell me you won't leave because I'll slit ya fucking throat
I'll slit them like my wrists
& then your neck I'll slowly choke
If I can't fucking have you then no one else will
I'll tie you to the headboard until you say your love is real
Say you fucking love me
& I'll slowly climb on top
You can make love to my insides
While my world begins to rock
I fucking hate you
I hate you
My love was never real
I never loved you like I convinced myself I did
I'm coming back to sanity
The world is upright again
They've broken through the magic
After I finally let the demons in
07.18.13 -- 11:16pm
Red Bank, NJ
